Tehelka!!!

Let's say you are an executive at Coke, and you were responsible for improving the almost non-existent sales of Diet Cherry Coke. You know that the thing tastes like cough syrup, so you're pretty confident that usual methods like ad campaigns won't work. So what do you do?

Here's what you do: You fill up the slots meant for Iced Tea in select vending machines with Diet Cherry Coke. So whenever somebody wants to get 1 can of ice tea, he gets 1 can of Diet Cherry Coke instead, right?


Wrong. You are the kind of schemer who makes Karl Rove look like Isiah Thomas[1]. You don't make the switch at any old vending machine. You do it at vending machines at select universities, usually near the bookstores. You know that men of learning, some of whom are enrolled in advanced programs in science and technology, use these vending machines.


You know that a man of learning, on getting a Diet Cherry Coke instead of an Iced tea, does not just curse the vending machine and walk away. A man of learning does not make assumptions about the behavior of a system with just one sample. A man of learning tries to get another Iced Tea, and verifies that the problem is indeed repeatable. He also considers getting a third sample, to check the system for non-linearities, but rejects it the idea as going too far.

But that's not all, is it? A man of learning, having resolved beyond reasonable doubt that asking the vending machine for an Iced Tea results in his getting a Diet Cherry Coke, wonders if the relation is symmetric. He wonders if asking for a Diet Cherry Coke will get him an Iced Tea. He tries it and discovers to his utter dismay that the relation is asymmetric and that asking for a Diet Cherry Coke gets him a Diet Cherry Coke.

Defeated, the man of learning walks away with 3 Diet Cherry cokes.








[1] Indianized version: John Buchanan look like Kapil Dev

Foreign student tries to learn English - Part 1

a. When English-speaking people want to say that a person is really nice, why do they call him/her awfully nice, even if this person is not bad or unpleasant in any way?

b. Is this usage connected in any way to the widespread phenomenon of people expressing their admiration for a really big flat-screen TV by saying "Man, that's sick"?

Trivia question

Which Hindi song features Akshay Kumar in a white shirt and yellow pants in a railway track?

Research idea

All you bio-molecular-chemical genetic engineering research scientists(or whatever it is that you are called), I have a humble request for you:

Please develop a technique for the prevention of hair loss that does not involve the application of sticky substances on one's head, preferably within the next one year.


Thank you.

Good news and a mind-blowing thought.

Good news: This.


Mind-blowing thought: Life wouldn't be as much fun if it was easier, would it?

Four things feminism has done for me.

This seems to be a chain post sort of thing, and I felt like joining in. Here goes:


1. Women can vote, and they mostly vote for the Dems. If not for feminism, the neo-cons would have always been in power and would have had blown up half the world by now.

2. Women get an education. Some of the most formidable competition I have faced came from women. And it made me better at what I do.

3. An extension of the previous point: college wouldn't have been so much fun without the women.

4. Women are no longer afraid to speak up. I would have missed out on the most enjoyable fights of my life if not for feminism.

Right to information

Read this wonderful article titled "Misuse of RTI Act" a while back. Some comments:

"There are chances that the RTI Act might be used by many for settling scores or taking revenge against some person. In that case, some provisions of the Act could prove to be perilous," said Gujarat transport commissioner and IAS officer KC Mahapatra while addressing the audience at the workshop on RTI Act during the International Mayors Conference in the city on Wednesday.

Really, Mr Mahapatra? Let us go through this slowly:

1. Person A hates government servant B.

2. A uses the RTI Act and exposes some mistake that B has made.

3. B gets fired because he did something wrong.


I'm not sure what the problem is. There's no way A can use the RTI act to frame B, all he is allowed to do is ask for information. If B did something wrong, then it's a good thing if he gets exposed.

If the result of an action is undeniably good, who cares what the motive behind the action is.

He found some support from Kolkata mayor BR Bhattacharya, who too criticised the sweeping powers given to the citizens under the RTI Act. "The Act should be modified and the sweeping powers awarded to the citizens must be reduce," Bhattacharya said.

Now Mr Bhattacharya, the act merely allows our citizens to know what their representatives are doing in their name. I'm not sure if that counts as a sweeping power in the great state of West Bengal, but I can inform you that it is seen as a basic right in much of the free world.

First Language

This guy says: "It's ok that your writing is so bad, you know, because English is not your first language. I completely understand, I find it incredibly hard to write French."

Me: "Errm. I think English is my first language, because I can't write in any other language."

Guy: "Oh......... ok."

More Orkut

My friend forwards me this message from a Ms Shilpa Surana who says :

Have you ever wondered how the Orkut "Add to my crush-list" option works?Most of us are scared to add someone to our crush-list because of the fear that he/she will get a notification from Orkut that you have added him/her on your crush-list. YES, they will get such a notification. But that is only if they too add you on their crush list. In fact, you both will get a message from Orkut if you both have added each other on your respective crush lists. This is a fantastic piece of innovation from Orkut wherein one-side crushes will not be notified and if mutual crush exists, then both sides will come to know of it.

Spreading this information is important. It will help the cause of many people and who knows, you may be the lucky one too!!! So start adding people to your crush-lists now and spreading this vital information!!!Happy Orkutting!!!!

Delightful stuff, isn't it?

Back

- The last couple of weeks were really busy but ultimately unproductive. Bah!!


- An unfortunate side effect was that I couldn't continue a rather interesting discussion.


- In America, winning a major championship is always about redemption. If the Cardinals win this World Series it's going to be redemption for Jeff Weaver. If the Mets win, it's redemption for the entire franchise. If the Tigers win, it's going to be a Cinderella story that makes the whole BoSox thing seem like old hat.

The sole exception to this rule is when the Patriots win the Super Bowl. Then it's just Standard Operating Procedure.


- The Tamil film industry puts as much effort in naming its movies as I do in giving titles to my blog posts.


- In my Master's thesis acknowledgment I said:

I also thank the entire UCF community for being extremely kind to me and for tolerating my occasionally erratic driving.

That was a car with automatic transmission, now I'm trying to drive a stick shift.



- All I need to do is to start a revolution in Bolivia and this photo is going to make the Guevara photo obsolete.

About me

- You know how some people automatically assume that you can help repair their TVs, just because you are an electrical engineer?

I'm that way with web programmers, I keep bugging them to help me do things with my blog.

What's the thing people say about stuff going around and coming around?


- I get the most fascinating ideas: If I would link to every post that somebody wrote, would that be cyber-stalking?


- Reason #34 not to watch TV: You get nasty surprises. You've been listening to a song for a couple of years. You really like it. You turn on the TV. You see Prabhu and Ramya Krishnan dancing to it.


Please read this post first. Now, here are some songs that might not help:

4. Any Shakti Kapoor song with exposed chaddi and naada hanging out.

3. Aati nahin.( Relax for a second now. Imagine. Sanjay Kapoor. Constipated expression. Thank you.)

2. Padosan apne murgi ko rakhna sambhal, mera murga hua hai deewana. (Please do not translate to English and visualize. Thank you.)

1. Amma dekh


The elevated one has promised a post on this subject, but the elevated one is not very good at keeping promises.